10-7-13 Qualifying The Deacon Or Pastor By His Wife

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1 Timothy 3:8-13 “Deacons likewise must be dignified, not double- tongued, not addicted to much wine, not greedy for dishonest gain. They must hold the mystery of the faith with a clear conscience. And let them also be tested first; then let them serve as deacons if they prove themselves blameless. Their wives likewise must be dignified, not slanderers, but sober- minded, faithful in all things. Let deacons each be the husband of one wife, managing their children and their own households well. For those who serve well as deacons gain a good standing for themselves and also great confidence in the faith that is in Christ Jesus.”

We now move into the qualifications of the second office of the church, deacon. I am not going to spend the same amount of time going through each of these qualifications like we did for the elder because I think that the lists are essentially the same. I mentioned before that the one qualification that sets the elder apart from the deacon is that the elder must be able to teach and no such requirement exists for the deacon. There is however one qualification which I think transfers over to the elder but is not mentioned in his list, it is the qualification of the deacon’s wife.

It follows that if the elder or the deacon is to manage their household well, that their wives would be included among those that are managed by the leader of God’s church; and that is exactly what we will look at now. The wife of the elder or the deacon “must” be dignified, not a slanderer, but sober-minded, and faithful in all things. Dignified means that she is to be grave, honorable, and revered for her character. There should be no cause for question that the wife of the pastor or deacon loves Jesus Christ. She must not be a slanderer. A slanderer falsely accuses someone. It is a lady who is not led by the truth of God’s word, but by the gossip of hurtful words that can flow so easily around the members of God’s church. She must be sober-minded. Not only must she not be given to alcohol, but she must be temperate throughout all of her behavior. Lastly, she must be faithful in all things. She is to be truthful and sure, worthy of confidence from all she comes in contact with. This is the woman who is to be the helper, lover and friend of the man who seeks the office of deacon or pastor of God’s church. 

I remember reading that it was required of Jonathan Edwards wife that she, along with her children, were to be up on stage facing the congregation while her husband delivered the message to the church. This would be very nerve racking but I think illustrates the point nicely of what our text is saying. These qualifications of the lady of God are also to be something you my daughters are to strive toward. And these qualifications of the deacon and elder are worthy of pursuing for you my son. The Lord wants a pure and chaste bride, and he wants the husband and wife team who leads his church to be models of Christ’s character to His people. 

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